Miss Manners Would Just DIE Here

51XOhLmYMXL._SY344_BO1,204,203,200_How do you teach children, especially GROWN children, that we DO NOT take the last of something…that we DO NOT take things without asking first…how do we let them have access to the stuff in the kitchen without having to watch them like a hawk so they don’t eat everything I have gotten to make dinner with for the next two weeks????

And mostly, how the HELL do I keep them out of my stash????

I have become creative in my hiding of the myriad of peanut butter jars I have strewn around the house because one of them, sprung from my womb who shall remain nameless, eats peanut butter the way most of us breathe air.  In MY house if you find a jar of peanut butter (and I am not talking the little piker 16 oz jars either, I am talking the big, honking 32 oz jars) with a bottom deep well in a newly opened jar, you can bet Peanut Butter Boy has been in the area,

And now I have about 6 jars of peanut butter in various and sundry locations that, to be honest, even *I* am not on a need to know basis about where they are.

Dishes seem to disappear too.  Mugs and bowls and spoons especially.  I actually had to ask the oldest one of them if they had any mugs or spoons or bowls hidden away up in their lairs.  The next day about 14 gabillion spoons, mugs and bowls in varying states of decay appeared,

Update:  They’re starting to go missing again and one bowl, I fear, may have just been taken away with the garbage today.  I liked it too.

I try to hide the dry goods that I have for recipes and baked goods as well as I can although I did find empty bags of chocolate chips this spring so I am fairly sure we didn’t have a mouse and I feel confident enough in my covert surveillance to tell you they were eaten one by one by one or the other of the children as they rummaged secretly through my baking stash.

After they asked me if they could have a Yoplait and then took a bag of tortilla chips I had bought for a taco casserole right out of the grocery bag I had it stored in and ate them in front of me WITHOUT asking, I decided it was time to protect my cold and frozen goods stash.  Simply hiding the ice cream that I dole out sparingly to them and the bagels that would cause a food frenzy if I put all on the table at one time was no longer enough.

I usually hide things in plastic bags encased within things I know they don’t have an interest in like frozen matzah meal containers or ricotta cheese.  I’ll stuff bags around everything and packets of hot dogs buns and bread.  They’d die before they’d take out a loaf of bread to thaw so I know all is good that way.

But I still need insurance.

I finally told the oldest, who is the chief rummager, that the stuff in the drawers is off limits.  I plan to follow up with two big signs that say the same thing.

Now if I could just get them to stop putting the banana peels and apple cores in the sink.

2 thoughts on “Miss Manners Would Just DIE Here

  1. This sounds like my house. Go for chocolate chips –gone. Bought cookie dough from a fundraiser –gone, eaten frozen. Cheese -buh bye! Mine didn’t put the peels in the sink, but stuck the stupid little stickers to the sink. (husband)


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